I’ve got a doctorate from this school.
Sadly the best schools close for the season.
When you are on vacation in Cape Cod, there is always the possibility of a rainy day. And that strikes fear into the hearts of parents who dread the prospect of having to entertain their children in cozy cottage confines.
Besides resorting to making another Cape Codder (see Vodka Amongst the Cranberries), there is another option. To escape the hysteria from cabin fever, volunteer, grudgingly at first, to drive out into the deluge in search of lunch. When you do, you will soon be greeted, as I was, by a number of lobster roll options. Lobster rolls, of course, will, not only get the family to temporarily forget about the rainy day blues but your stature within the family will be elevated to hero status.
First you notice the $7.99 option at a small market. And then just down the road, there is the $8.49 offering at a deli. But you remember the $10 lobster rolls you had the previous year on the Cape and there was certainly nothing wrong with those. The choices have you in a quandary and you almost drive off the road.
Being the decisive man you are, however, you know what you have to do. You pull into the market and order two of the $7.99 offerings. Dodging the raindrops, you get back into your car and drive down to the deli where two young men with thick Russian accents brag that their lobsters rolls are the best on the Cape. “You’ve sold me,” you tell them.
Finally, you return to the seafood shack where you went the previous year and order two of the reliable $10 lobster rolls—just in case the Russians were wrong.
Your bounty now in three separate bags, you have delicious incentive to return to the madness that is a Cape Cod cottage on a rainy day.
Preventing any skirmishes, you cut the lobster rolls in half so everyone can taste one of each.
The least expensive, $7.99 option*, despite the added bonus of the hot dog roll being toasted, got the fewest accolades.
The $8.49** lobster roll, though bursting with meat and light on the mayonnaise, was not, the Russian opinion aside, “the best lobster roll on the Cape. It was, however, very good.
The clear winner was the priciest at $10***, but the added two dollars resulted in a lobster roll bursting with meat and though a tad heavy on the mayonnaise, the best of the three.
By the time the lobster rolls are consumed, the rain will have stopped. The doors will open and the soothing and constant sound of a basketball clanging against a backboard will replace the inside board game bickering. Before long it will be time to ponder a pre-dinner Cape Codder.
*Nauset Market, 5030 State Highway, Eastham, MA
**Maurice’s Market, 80 State Highway, Wellfleet, MA
***Young’s Fish Market, Rock Harbor Rd, Orleans, MA
I have no insecurities about imbibing a cocktail with a pinkish hue. Not if the pink comes from a substantial splash of cranberry juice—the dark red of the juice turning pink when mixing with the spirit of choice: vodka. And especially if that vodka is a gift from our Russian allies. Add a few ice cubes and a slice of lime and after a few sips, any doubts I might have had about my manhood and those stone age stereotypes regarding “girlie” cocktails immediately disappear.
Still, there are times when vodka and cranberry juice taste better than others. And it has nothing to do with the vodka or the juice.
It has to do with where you drink it.